This article, about a mom defending her daughter’s right to not wear Spanx under a prom dress she didn’t even want, passed through my facebook feed today.
I’m not impressed. I’m not saying mom’s heart isn’t in the right place. I totally agree that the sales person was out of line and absolutely deserved to be corrected. It’s the justification that followed that makes me want to claw my eyes out.
Girls of all ages, shapes and sizes are perfect because that is how God made them. […] My daughter is tall, she swims, runs, dances and does yoga. She’s fit. She’s beautiful.
First of all it assumes a common deity for all of us. Not a fan, but whatever. My real issue is that she chose to justify her daughters beauty because of fitness and the activities she participates in. If she wasn’t so fit, would mom still have picked this dress?
It’s true that “many girls suffer from poor self image and telling them they need something to make them perfect can be very damaging.” I think what mom failed to realize is that this includes fitness and health. It’s great to stand up for your daughter. To let her know you love her just how she is. But what if one day she is disabled somehow. Will you still find her beautiful? And what about people with chronic illnesses or different abilities that don’t allow them to maintain a rigid fitness schedule? Are they any less worthy? I don’t think so.
I recognize that this woman likely didn’t expect her post to go viral. But it did. And it’s for reasons like this that it’s so important that we think about the language we use.